Hull City Mad

Last updated : 25 April 2010 By Tom Collins & Andy Beill
"Are they havin' a laugh?!"

Will we/won’t we get Owen? Predictably Stoke have got in on the act now, like a small child crying at a party crying because someone else is getting all the attention.

megaphoneSheffield_Tiger: If he were a racehorse, he'd be glue by now... Then again, Brown isn't the best judge of horses

The Owen move was used as another means to take the piss by the national media, who looked at where we were in 2001, the week Owen bagged a hat-trick in Munich (the first laid on by Barmby by the way). For the record, we beat Kidderminster thanks to a late Gary Alexander strike, at the point in the season where we thought our massive outlay under Brian Little would bring promotion with great ease. How wrong we were.

megaphoneNewcastle United Mad: Brown says "money does not motivate Owen" ... which is perfectly right! Newcastle paid £40.5m over four years for the parasite ... and he STILL couldn't get motivated!

A reality check came with the approach for Marc Antoine Fortuné. £3.5 million for a striker who scored five goals for a team that was relegated? That’s more like it! To be fair, he looked a handful in his spell at West Brom last season, and could be the blunt tool we need to trouble defenders, especially with someone like Fraizer Campbell as a partner in crime.

City are also reportedly interested in Quinton Fortune, who since leaving Manchester United has had short spells with Bolton, Sunderland, Brescia in Italy's Serie B and Tubize in Belgium's First Division, and is now a free agent. We can't help thinking that some journalist has got mixed up between the two namesakes but stranger things have happened... like Hull City trying to sign Michael Owen.

"I've got all of Angola's games on here"

Phil Brown said that it "doesn't take a rocket scientist" to work out that new signings will replace current low-scoring members of the strikeforce. Was it a rocket scientist that proposed signing Manucho to replace Marlon King? If so, we suggest reverting to traditional scouting methods.

Bryan Hughes may also be on his way to add some grey hair to Middlesbrough’s kindergarten. Eatsleepsport called him a "Tigers Ace", which might be pushing it a bit, but he was a decent servant despite having the worst shooting of any midfielder who isn’t named Dean Marney. He's certainly no Michael Owen, anyway.

Phil Brown received ANOTHER fine from the FA, this time for remarks made about Mike Riley. They clearly failed to take into account the ridiculous 3 yard-offside goal Brown was referring to. But at least Arsenal failed to receive any punishment over the whole episode. Good to see there’s no top-four preference isn’t it? This story had nothing to do with Michael Owen.

After agreeing personal terms, Michael Owen undergoes a rigorous 5 minute medical. His records show that an operation was carried in 2006 out to remove a condition that he had for the first 8 years of his career, but since the operation he no longer has any trace of it and the deal goes through. City subsequently put Daniel Cousin up for sale and produce a 32-page brochure on him in Arabic.

Hull City MadThis week's "Hull City Mad" written by Andy Beill and Tom Collins.
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